Sunday, May 30, 2010

"Lately I feel like I'm coming home..."

Peace in My Tummy
A friend asked me yesterday what I feel in my tummy...what is it that I find when I focus my thinking there, on those deep feelings.

For me it was a picture that rose to the surface but also some sensations that went along with it. I felt like I was standing, a cement wall behind me and open space in front of me. A large hand was at my back, pushing me forward. Whatever was in front of me was good, peaceful, free and open. A fresh breeze I've only felt and smelled once before, in a meadow at Tuolumne in Yosemite, about 11 years ago. I can still feel and smell and even taste that breeze as if it happened today. That's what the space ahead of me in this picture was like.

This is a season in my life in which the future is unknown. I'm not sure of much beyond next week, to be honest. But there is a new peace these last few days as I think about that unknown. Can't explain it. I just know, as Julian of Norwich wrote, "All is well, and all manner of things will be well."

What do you find when you focus on your tummy and feel a warmth filling it? What do you "know" in that "knowing place" inside of you in that moment?

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Falling into....what?

"It is the feeling of finally moving in the direction I have always tried to move in but could never succeed at.

It is the feeling of an aching need that was as part of me as my own flesh being finally fulfilled more exquisitely than I could ever have imagined.

I am not fighting. I am joyfully going where I am being taken, with every fiber of my being.

It is a feeling of falling, deliciously, into joy.

And then I land."


The above in an excerpt from something I've written. But I'm wondering....

As you read the above, what comes to mind?

Where is it that YOU are being taken?

In what are YOU landing?

Where and what is that place for you?

Is it a place? A person? A truth?

Or could it be a "knowing" that you've been avoiding for awhile now, but realize has been there all along?

Something else?

There's no "right answer"....

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Shell Gatherers

Shell Gatherers (how I feel tonight)

Despite whatever differences we may have,
deep down inside there's a longing in each one of us

to be "picked"...
and to "pick"...

and then when we've picked another
and they've seen the truth of who we are

to be picked again

every day...
come what may...

to be the pretty shell someone sees among all the others
and catches up in their hand
and tucks into their pocket
and then holds
even after they've let go of everything else

and then
when it feels like we have been discarded
we run
we hide
we go away

today I rest in the sand
a shell among shells
waiting (but living)
hoping (but breathing)
lying back in the sand (and laughing into the sun)

trusting love
to see

but not hiding 'til then
(not anymore)

Instead -
being love
seeing you
picking you
in this moment


Lyrics | A Fine Frenzy lyrics - You Picked Me lyrics

Monday, May 17, 2010

My Bucket List

My Bucket List....#1-9 (these aren't by order of importantance...more to come):

-See New Zealand
-Run a full marathon
-Ride a horse again....& no stupid guided "walks," but actually full-out running type of riding
-Take my girls to American Girl Plac
-See Moraine Lake in Banff again
-Learn to make tatted lace
-Get in kick-ass, GI Jane-type good shape (I already have the camo pants so I think this goal is within reach! ;) lol)
-Do something that terrifies me like hang-gliding
-Go to Italy

(to be continued....)

Friday, May 7, 2010

Hey, Mama, Hey Mama...

Cuz I thing...that I love you...I love you, I love you, I love you... :)

Wednesday, May 5, 2010


Love is reckless, not reason.

Reason seeks a profit.

Love comes on strong,

consuming herself, unabashed.

Yet, in the midst of suffering,

Love proceeds like a millstone,

hard surfaced and straightforward.

Having died of self-interest,

she risks everything and asks for nothing.

Love gambles away every gift God bestows.

Without cause God gave us Being;

without cause, give it back again.