The only reason I get up in the morning is because my real self knows, wants and is capable of loving. The people closest to me have almost without exception hurt me...from one perspective. From another I have hurt them. But to pull back and see the whole picture is to see that we are spirits/real selves having a human experience in the mind body. The people who have mishandled me are just as good inside as I am. From a certain perspective the man who shot innocent children today is someone who needs love, compassion and of course truth, more than you and I do.
To say that someone else is inherently evil is to say I might be, too. If I am inherently evil, or you are, why am I able to love my kids unconditionally? Why am I holding some hope that people like my kids are able to walk into adulthood with a sense of who they really are, as well as a realistic vision of what their mind body is capable of?
Some mind bodies need psychiatric drugs. Some are in so much pain that they need to smoke pot. Some need more hugs. Some need a regular routine. Some need to not eat dairy or wheat. Some would die if their bee stings went untreated. Some need all their skin to be covered at all times. Some need glasses. Some need a prosthesis.
The only hope we have is that we each get a mind body to pilot and we can become more or less aware of how that mind body ticks, what it needs, etc. while we are having a human experience. The only hope is not a god who infuses goodness into those who choose to believe certain theology, but rather a race of human beings who house a spirit that is connected to all other spirits AND housed in a mind body that simply works how a mind body works.
And we get to love. We get to impact the human experience of others by living from our own real selves, and doing so even when others don't. This is also why religion that asks for behavior modification never does anything but make people shove awareness of their mind body further into their subconscious. It is only by listening to the voice of our real selves...our knowing...our higher self, etc. that we can learn to live from our spirit rather than our mind bodies.
Forgiveness is not defining the other person by the thing they did that hurt or harmed us; it is the insistence that they are not "all bad." It is insisting on recognizing, no matter how I've been hurt, that the other person is not a perpetrator who was always this evil, anymore than I'm inherently a victim who was always going to be victimized. It is putting your own energy behind validating the real self of even the person who hurt you most. Having hope for them. Desiring for them to be out of the perpetrator role, out from under the judgment of others and out of whatever it is that is *wrong*/wounded in their mind body. I do NOT think saying this invalidates anyone's pain. I have experienced that having this perspective, or at least pointing in the direction of it, is one of the best ways to heal.